We were asked to go to the hospital emergency department yesterday after visiting the test center. Outside the entrance everyone was asked by a doctor why they came to emergency and if they had any symptoms of CONVID 19. The emergency department won’t do testing for CONVID, people who think they have it need to go to specific testing centres. This was an effective way to keep hospital from being overloaded with highly contagious patients. While mum and I were sitting on the side waiting to find out where we would go next, I overheard these conversations between the doctor and visitors.

One well dressed lady holding a slice of cake in her hands. She was a bit shaky and was wiping her tears with tissues in her hand. She told the doctor that she also worked at the hospital, today was her birthday and she started having fevers and chills about 2 hours ago. She could not get through the health-line for hospital staff members and she didn’t know what to do. The doctor helped her to finally reached someone else on the phone and directed her to another place.

An Asian lady came up to the doctor said she didn’t know what to do with her situation. She got a call from the police told her that one of her staff was a victim of domestic abuse, and asked for her to come to the hospital to see her. The doctor let her through.

An elderly couple who could be well over their 70s holding hands and walked up slowly, the wife explained to the doctor her husband has hearing issues and she needed to go inside with him for check ups on his heart. The doctor explained due to CONVID, there is no visitor allowed. She and her husband hold hands even tighter saying they could not be separated and need to go in together, the doctor called someone to consult then let both of them in.

A couple in their 30s were waiting at the end of the line.The doctor asked them if they could wait a bit longer as she needed to call for more support. The guy replied “of course, I can wait”. Finally it was their turn, he said his dad was due to have an open heart surgery today and he wanted to go inside and see him, the doctor let them through,

I saw a sign it said only on the grounds of compassion and essential reasons a visitor is allowed in. Base on all these conversations I overheard , I think the hospital followed this rule really well. I wish all of these people and their loved ones are well. A million thanks to the doctors and nurses who are helping and saving us.

 

There are many articles talking about how people gained new skills or developed positive habits over the lockdown. At the beginning I was also very motivated to stay active and keep a good routine. I have to admit about a week ago, I have been getting back to my old ways.

I scroll on my phone a lot more, start reading more news as the bad news do not worry me as much as a month ago. I had a news detox for about 3 weeks since the virus reached NZ, but now things have been under control for a bit I start reading more and more things online. I felt most things I consume are fluffs which are useless information, they don’t contribute anything valuable to me. I want to keep focus on reading more real books instead of mindless scrolling online.

At the start of the level 4 lockdown, I was out for a walk first thing in the morning almost everyday, even when it was dark and raining I would get out of the door and head straight to the park. It was a very good way to start the day, I felt energised and ready for a new day. Now the mornings are a bit colder and I found it was hard to get out of bed, so my mornings starting to become spending more time in bed thinking about how I shall start the day rather than just get up and do it. I want to keep being active and stay focused on a good routine in the morning.

Also I ate more snacks after dinner now, which I stopped doing for 4 weeks. Once I am less stressed, my appetite got better. Hopefully I can really stop eating snacks in the evenings. It was nice to wake up feeling hungry in the morning, I want to keep it that way.

Last two days were a bit hectic, mum was in and out of hospital due to flu symptoms. We all got tested and luckily all came back with negative results. I am still feeling a bit unease, as mum still has a fever. But I felt that this virus has impacted so many people’s lives already, and if it touched my family, I will face it with courage. Its bad to get sick, but sickness has always been part of life.

• I am grateful that we both have jobs and my work is essential business during lock down
• I am grateful Isabella hurt her arm today and we saw our family doctor very easily, he fixed her arm straight away
• I am grateful I can read both English and Chinese, so I can get information from both languages
• I am grateful that I am fit and healthy, I enjoy exercise, yoga and walk
• I am grateful I can hear many great thoughts and read many great books
• I am grateful my parents both are healthy
• I am grateful my in-laws came to visit us and also returned home safely
• I am grateful my loved ones are not affected by the virus so far
• I am grateful I have great friends who I can chat and share thoughts with
• I am grateful I can communicate easily with people around me
• I am grateful I have a healthy appetite and enjoy delicious home cooked meals daily
• I am grateful where I live there are lots of green spaces
• I am grateful for all the amazing people who come across my path, I learnt a lot from them
• I am just very grateful that I am here today

Things have changed so quickly this week. On Monday I noticed Air New Zealand announced they are cutting down 85% of long haul flights. I decided to book the flight for mum who was in Canada visiting her brother to return home soon. By Wednesday NZ announced they are shutting down the borders only allowing PR and Citizens to enter. Wed and Thur were the sleepless nights for me, thankfully mum’s flight was not cancelled. She made it home this morning, my dad dropped her car at the airport and she drove herself home starting the 2 weeks isolation. My dad moved in with us.

The stress level is up and down, last time I felt this anxious was waiting to fly out of Beijing while I was pregnent with Bella. I had always felt a bit nervous with flights, This time I am very thankful for Air NZ to continue the Vancouver – Auckland flight which brought mum back to us.

Things are not well in NZ. I am hoping the government can quickly escalate the level of urgency of the situation so that people can stop moving around. We are carrier of the virus, every time we step outside the door we are risking our own health and other people’s. I felt angry when someone at work continued to sneeze and cough and still be in the office. This person even wanted to pat her hand on me when she wanted a friendly chat. I just really don’t understand why our perceptions of reality can be so drastically different. Why can’t people take social distancing seriously? While I write this, someone in the neighbourhood is having a birthday party, as I can hear them singing songs. We live in multiple realities, some people are consumed by fear and they are struggling with the situation, some people continue to go out clubbing and still go to work thinking that they “just have a cold”.

What I have learnt is that as humans are we will never agree on anything, sometime to achieve a common goal some extreme measures need to be taken. I read an article that after this pandemic the world will become smaller, less open and less tolerant. I choose not to believe in this. I think this virus are teaching us some very important lessons right now:

1. Be close to people who matter
2. Do NOT mess with nature
3. Slow down, focus on the simple things
4. Think before you act

I dont know by the end of the year what kind of things I am going to write down. All I know is that the next 4 weeks will be more and more challenging for each one of us. However, what I can choose is my mindset. Bring this on. I am moving on this earth with grace, carrying hope and deliver it with clarity and strength. May you and the ones you love all be healthy and prosper.